After the Beep
by mutents
Summary: They always seemed to miss each other...
1. Dialing Sansa Stark

"Hello, you've reached the Stark household. We cannot come to the phone now, but if you leave your name and number, we'll get back to you a soon as we can."

"Uhh, hello. This is Sandor, umm, Sandor Clegane. I'm Joffery's bodyguard. I'm just calling for Miss Sansa Stark; she left her backpack in the limo tonight, and I figured she'd probably want it back before the weekend's up. I'll just... try again later, I guess."

* * *

"Hey!"

"Hi!"

"This is Sansa!"

"And this is Shae!"

"We're currently busy-"

"Getting completely smashed!"

"Shae! Anyway, we can't bothered to answer our phone right now, so leave your digits, and we'll get back to you."

"Probably."

"Maybe."

"Unlikely!"

"Hey, little bird. I know you're probably glad to be rid of the little shit, but... Well, I was wondering if you'd want to get together some time. Maybe for coffee, or drinks, or something. I'd... I'd like to still see you."

* * *

"I'm not in. I'm actually out. You know what to do."

"I guess this is just how we're going to end up doing this now. Always missing each other."

* * *

"You've reached the more mature half of the Stark sisters. Neither of us are currently available, but if you leave your contact information, I'm sure one of us will give you a call back!"

"I've been dreaming about you, little bird... Dreaming about all the things I'd like to do to you. Do you know how glorious your breasts are, little bird? They're like perfect... breasts. You're perfect. I've always thought that. I love you."

* * *

"You've reached the more mature half of the Stark sisters. Neither of us are currently available, but if you leave your contact information, I'm sure one of us will give you a call back!"

"Ignore that message from last night. I was completely drunk."

* * *

"You've reached the residence of Sansa and Willas Tyrell. We are currently on our honeymoon, but we'll return your call as soon as we get home from our cruise."

"The wolf bitch told me the good news. Congrats, I guess."

* * *

"This is the home phone for the Tyrell's. At this time, we are unavailable. Most likely, we're taking Olenna to soccer, taking Ned to chess club, or bringing Kenly to one of her many doctor appointments. We're sorry for the inconvenience, but if you give us the usual information, we'll certainly get back to you."

"Hard to believe you've got three babes already, and another on the way. Seems like just last week I was ripping Joffery off of you as the bastard tried to rape you. I... probably shouldn't have said that on your family's answering machine... I just wanted to tell you that... Well, I'm not doing very well, little bird. Don't know why I thought you'd care, but maybe you do."

* * *

"This is the Tyrell house. Neither Willas or I can currently come to the phone; we aren't moving as fast as we once did. But, if you leave your name, number, and a short message, we'll be sure to get ahold of you."

"Little bird... I just... wanted to hear... your voice... once more... I always... loved you... Sansa... Goodbye..."

* * *

"Hello?"

"Is this Mrs. Sansa Tyrell?"

"This is she."

"Hi. I'm calling from Quiet Isle's Nursing Home. We have you listed down as the next of kin for one Sandor Clegane. Mr. Clegane passed away a few hours ago, and we are contacting you to inquire as to how you would like to proceed with the funeral plans."

"My lord..."

"If you would like, we could give you our address so you can come and see Mr. Clegane's body prior to transport. It might make the planning slightly easier."

"Yes... Yes, I'd like to see him one last time..."

* * *

**A.N.**

I'm not even sure where this idea came from, just that I really liked it.

As always, this is not beta-d, so if you see any errors, please tell me!


	2. Dialing Sandor Clegane

"Umm... Hello?"

"What?"

"Is this Mr. Clegane?"

"What do you want?"

"It's... It's Sansa. Sansa Stark. I just wanted to say thank you for keeping track of my bag. I... I know it's your job to worry about Joffery, not me, so... I just wanted to say thank you."

"It's nothing."

* * *

"You've reached the Hound. I'm busy, so leave a message or fuck off."

"Hello Mr. Clegane. I just wanted to tell you that I'm not living with Joffery anymore; I took your advice. I'm really sorry you got fired for protecting me... It's really not fair... Any way, Shae and I decided to get a place together. So, feel free to call me... Bye, I guess."

* * *

"You've reached the Hound. I'm busy, so leave a message or fuck off."

"Well, this is ironic. I just get your message about drinks, call you up to accept, and end up having to leave a message. I'd love to get drinks with you sometime Sandor. Maybe Friday?"

* * *

"You've reached the Hound. I'm busy, so leave a message or fuck off."

"Hello Sandor. I just... I never thanked you for saving me that night from Joffery. I really should have; I mean, it's why you lost your job... You really are an amazing man Sandor.

* * *

"You've reached Sandor. Say something, or hang up."

"Arya, Margaery, and Shae decided to... throw me a hen party. I think I've maybe had one too many drinks... Anyway, I know the weddings in a couple of weeks, but I wanted you to know Sandor, that I love you. I never really told you that, even for those few brief months we were together. If I wasn't marrying Willas, I would probably want to marry you."

* * *

"You've reached Sandor. Say something, or hang up."

"I was looking through my calls from last night, and one of the calls was to you. I can't imagine it was the best of messages, and I'm not trying to escape blame, but I wasn't exactly sober. I wanted to apologize for whatever it was I said, because I'm sure it was awful."

* * *

"You've reached Sandor. I'm not able to get to the phone, so leave a message. I'll try to get back to you."

"I'm sure Arya called you when our second son was born. It seems these days her relationship with you is better than ours... Anyway. Willas and I have been discussing who we want as godparents for Mace. Arya is of course Ollena's, Jon is Ned's, and both Margaery and Brienne are Brienne's. Well, I decided that I'd like you to be Mace's godfather. It's really not that hard, you just have to show up for the baptism. I just... I would really like it if you would accept."

* * *

"You've reached Sandor. I'm not able to get to the phone, so leave a message. I'll try to get back to you."

"Hello Sandor. Mace idemanded/i I call you up to tell you that he has a baseball game this Friday. I know it's only high school level, but he's pitching, so... He's pretty excited about it. Both he and I really are hoping you can make it!"

* * *

"Thank you for calling Quiet Isle's Nursing Home. Our visitor hours are between eight and six. If you would like to leave a message for a resident, just specify who and we'll pass it along for you."

"My message is for Sandor Clegane. I wanted to ask him if it was alright if my son and I visited him. My son just graduated college, and he really wanted to share his diploma with Sandor. After all, Sandor is why he went into engineering... I doubt that matters to you... If you could just, ask Sandor if he's alright with us stopping by, I'd really appreciate it."

* * *

"You've reached Sandor. I'm not able to get to the phone, so leave a message. I'll try to get back to you."

"I can hardly believe this old number is still in service... Your funeral was today. Mace brought along his bagpipes. You know how he spent a year abroad after high school; well, while he was over there in Scotland, he decided it was a must that he learn how to play the bagpipes. It was incredibly touching; he played the Bear and the Maiden Fair. Not exactly a funeral song, but you were never exactly what people expected, either. I... I can't believe your gone..."


End file.
